One gets the feeling Tom Clancy has been a much a part of most of the recent games being released with his name-sake as Richard Dawking was a part of the Popes Christmas mass last year. Yet Ubisoft still bring out game after game with the famed novelist gracing the cover. For all of you who do not know who Tom Clancy is first of all get yourself a vasectomy then head on down to the nearest library (if those still exist) and pick up a copy of Red October. HAWX however is not a gritty thriller about a Russian submarine at the height of the cold war, the plot of this game is something similar in extending the vast beauty of English literature as the mad ramblings of a drunken Glaswegian.  HAWX is by far one of the worst plots ever to be conceived! Now do not think that’s my entire opinion of HAWX revealed as it isn’t but just listen to this.
Plot:
You start off as the main protagonist from the last game Crenshaw the man who won’t nuke the white house no matter the pay (what a hero). On a routine flight the brave boy in blue is shot down by Insurgents. Now an insurgency is not one particular group of people but a name given to a armed rebellion fighting (in most cases a oppressive government) so you probablydeserved it. The game starts off in the middle east in the land that only game developers seem to know called ‘somewhere in the middle east’ this place is strangely used as the location of nearly all major modern conflicts in games. The reason for this is that game developers think putting Afghanistan or Iraq in a game will mean their office will look like a Dutch newspaper (look it up). Well when Crenshaw is shot down you play as another American who’d bomb a nine year old’s sleepover in Bagdad just so long as diabetics in Texas can have apple pie, smiling babies and cheap petrol. You also play as a Russian fighting more Insurgents, now I’m not that bad at Geography and the Russians seemed to be fighting in Chechnya and if you don’t know, the Russians started a policy of Genocide of the Chechens in 1999, so I’m playing as a character taking part in Genocide of innocents fighting for survival . It’s here where I stop as I don’t want to give away too much, the fact that three missions into the game I want to fly my plane into the Mountains shows how bad the plot is at driving the game though. So if you want HAWX ignore the cutscenes.
Graphics:
While it’s impossible to deny the planes look extremely ascetically pleasing the rest is up for debate. From a distance it looks amazing particularly when you fly over the snow topped mountains but get closer and you see it’s as blank and without texture as Kim Karnashain’s face when asked to count ten. But as a flight simulator it has the excuse that you go so fast it is almost impossible to see the highly untextured ground. Although it shots itself in the foot here as most missions involve getting up close and personal with ground troops with the cannon. There’s no excuse for when I’m having to get low enough to shoot the tanks for a building to leap into the third dimension and nostril fuck your plane. So the graphics aren’t able to redeem the world’s worse plot.
Gameplay:
The single player is around eight hours long. Now that’s better then most game to be fair, though all but one of the missions are so similar that I didn’t realise that I’d started a new level sometimes. The one mission that does stand out in the memory is the last where through what can only be described as the most predicable series of events ever I was forced to shoot down nuclear bombs before they left the atmosphere and this was fine then, boom! The level designers thought it would be cool if I had to avoided orbital laser attacks at the same time, now cool as this sounds it took over fifty tries to complete that mission as the vertical lasers appear 200 metres in front of you going 150 metres a second, do the maths. I would have slightly enjoyed the single player if I never played the last mission but I did so it’s worse then cancer (so long as you catch it early).
The multiplayer however was a barrel of fun, all one game I was able to find. Don’t even bother trudt me, the only people online are the meth addicted NRA retards that like the later Tom Clancy’s novels. The gameplay was fun but nobody normal was ever online and the people were  probably think deliverance is a movie what happened when they went to camp last year.
Personal Enjoyment (PE):
I liked the first HAWX as it was a flight sim for those who could never reach the twin towers on Microsoft flight simulator 2002 but the plot, gameplay and kamikaze graphics just ruined the experience. Now this was a waste as the core gameplay can be quite immersive and while the missions aren’t great they kept me playing for eight hours often ducking as a missle flew past the cockpit. The plot is just too bad though and without a good plot a game really does fall apart. Mafia 2 is a good exmple.
Overall I am disappointed with HAWX 2 it made me a Genocidal, redneck who hates orbital lasers and I don’t want to be that guy and I’m pretty sure nobody else does.
Plot: 35/100
Graphics: 64/100
Gameplay: 65/100
PE: 67/100
Overall: 57.75/100
